Coming Clean

In case you missed it, Monday’s post was a variation on “Two Truths and a Lie” in response to a challenge from The Hobbler. I am fairly certain that at least a dozen people have not slept a wink in the last three days in anticipation of the answers. So here they are.

The Truth

1) The dance troupe I toured with did a performance in Japan – And we did, indeed, dance for the wife of the chairman of the board of Toyota motors, Mrs. Toyoda. It was the best trip of my life. I am more graceful than I look. When my task is set to music. I will look for some action shots to share.

I know it's not a dancing shot, but I have trouble doing the steps and taking the picture at the same time.

In one of my dancing costumes. I'm the chick on the far left in the shortest dress. Sorry you had to see that.

4) I nearly missed my high school graduation to go to a dog show. My saluki was entered at the national specialty, and I had no intention of missing it. I had even arranged to take the ACT exam in the same state as the show on the day my dog wasn’t showing. Was my dog appreciative of my efforts? He was not. He pooped in the ring.

Gimme the bunny! Gimme!

7) I have a potted fern with a history. I started that thing from a tiny spore. My grandmother loved houseplants, and I think of her every time I see it.

9) Despite my number of posts on passive aggression I am not actually passive aggressive. I don’t usually waste my time on the passive aggressive. And my husband is grateful because I would apparently be quite good at it.

10)  When I visited Los Angeles, the only celebrity I saw was Judy Tenuta. Everyone I know says “Who?”    But she is a real person, and she’s funny. When her companion is not having to hold her upright. That was just sad.

11) I once bottle-fed a litter of deer mice. Their mommy had been killed, and I couldn’t let them starve. I studied feeding and re-release information online, and I fed them with a tiny syringe.

And the LIES!

2) I was once bitten by a baby  caimanI did use a baby caiman quite often when I did programs, and he turned into a nasty little son-of-a-pup as he got older, but I was never bitten. There were some close calls, though. You’ll have to buy the book to hear that tale.

3) I once swallowed a live goldfish on a bet. Eileen is right. This one isn’t actually a wish. Unless you count wishing that I had cool stories like that to tell.

5) I am turning a walk-in closet into a reptile room. My husband is so hoping that this is one of the lies. Truth be told, that walk-in closet is too cold for womas. I’m thinking maybe native species like rat snakes…

6) I once used the “f” word in a paper for high school English. I did, however, use the word “pecker.” And got an “A.” It was a character sketch about my dog-show friend who was, indeed a character. I wish that I could have found that paper to read at her funeral last year. She would have loved that. I miss her.

8) My most prized possession is a hard-cover first edition of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. I don’t have one yet. But I will. There is one out there waiting to come home with me.

12) I hatched a clutch of garter snake eggs that were found in a pile of mulch. I was waiting for someone to Google this one. Garter snakes are live-bearers. I did hatch a clutch of five-lined skinks and released the babies at their nesting site. That was pretty amazing, honestly.

Not a skink. A gecko. But we've hatched dozens of these guys. If you like this pic, wait until tomorrow. If you hate this pic, wait until tomorrow.

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29 thoughts on “Coming Clean

  1. I am starting to realize that I am not very good at figuring out when people are lying. It is a good thing I am not in politics…I wouldn’t be able to find anything to slam the other candidates with. You are a pretty great liar, so maybe you should run for office.

  2. You are some devious little so-and-so! I totally bought the garter snake story (as well as all the other reptile stories), but the live-bearing thing was a mean trick.
    Looks like I don’t know you at all. So you will just have to keep posting about yourself. Thank you.

  3. I totally believed the Harry Potter one. I’d write my own “Two Truths and a Lie” post, but am currently feeding the clutch of garter snake eggs in my closet with a syringe.

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