Some days, my life reads like a country song. Today has been one of those days. I will tell you my pitiful story, and then you will offer your forgiveness for today’s blog being a repost off my old site. Last night, my 16 year old cat had an awful medical issue that carried into today. She’s fine now, but between getting her to the vet and worrying about whether she’d be okay, I’m left feeling a little drained. Combine that with 45 minutes of sheer terror this morning when I realized my good friend hadn’t called or emailed me after his kayaking trip, and then I couldn’t reach him by phone, and you’ve got the makings of a rerun day. It all ended well Piper the cat did well with the anesthesia and will be home soon, and my friend Steve isn’t at the bottom of a lake somewhere (a shout-out to Steve for not being dead!). But I now have exactly two brain-cells left, and they’re not talking to one another.
So here’s a repost, with a few additions. I have tried very hard to edit it, but apparently I was going through an ee cummings phase when I wrote this originally. Please forgive words that should be capitalized but aren’t. I know. It bugs me, too.
I don’t understand. why is it that:
1) My husband managed to install our surround-sound approximately 30 seconds after we moved in, but he cannot snap up a sleeper to save his life??
2) My six year old can locate the great barrier reef on a globe but cannot find the hamper in his bedroom?
3) The old man can watch Gladiator without flinching but faints when he gives blood?
4) My dresser drawers are stuffed so full of clothes I can hardly close them, but most days I can’t find anything to wear?
5) I can spend a 12 hour day shopping thrift stores but can’t find the energy to fold my laundry?
6) We have many square feet of open floor space on the top floor of my house, but the cat will locate my son’s Tow-Mater slipper when she needs to vomit?
7) I’m so tired I can’t stand myself, but when I lay down I can’t sleep?
8 ) I have caught my kids’ poo in my hands, but when I ask my husband to use the booger sucker on the baby, he leaves a daddy-shaped hole in the door?
9) My daughter can name 14 species of gecko but cannot remember to bring home her lunchbox?
10) If we are checking books out of the library to save a little money, why do we refuse to return them on time?
11) Why is it that when I need him to wake up, the baby is so sound asleep that I need an air horn to rouse him, but he’s up like a shot when I’m just trying to put laundry away?
12) Why is it that I can find 32 socks, but none of them actually has a mate? (this one needs a blog post of its very own)
13) I don’t mind when the tortoises at the zoo poop when I’m soaking them, but I am unamused when Squish does it?
14) Why is it that Squish would eat a bug but turns his nose up at broccoli?