Pondering Deep

Some friends and I were talking today, and the topic turned to God. Seeing as how it was a Bible study, it seemed only natural. We talk a lot, but we do get to the point eventually, you know. As we pondered the great mysteries of the universe, all of us had questions that we want to ask God when we die. I will share with you some of mine.

1) Have You ever been in support of any of the atrocities we as humans have committed in Your name?

2) Who was really the first to develop the theory of evolution? Darwin or Wallace?

3) Is that Donald Trump’s real hair?

4) Did You have blueprints to create the platypus, or did You have bonus parts left over? For real. A venomous, egg-laying, duck-billed mammal. I love them so much!

5) Was Tyrannosaurus Rex a blood-thirsty predator or a weenie little scavenger? (with apologies to any scavengers who may be reading this post. You’re not all weenies, I am sure.)

6) Are there really aliens in Area 51? Or are they all in Washington, DC?

7) Is that Justin Bieber’s real hair?

8) Why does it feel so good to sneeze?

9) Is there a reason that nearly every animal on the planet tastes like chicken?

10) Twitter or Facebook?

11) Coke or Pepsi? (It’s Pepsi, right?)

And the most important question of all:

12) What do your targeted ads from Google say?


62 thoughts on “Pondering Deep

  1. Could you please do a recall on Rick Santorum? – No, I don’t mean THAT way… Just please “fix” him and then send him back. He’s been really running at the mouth lately and often in your Name, and this may not be very good for your image.

  2. Okay, sorry so serious, but I think I would ask God if He ever cries…when He sees how horrible we are to eachother. Especially for things like child abuse.

    On a lighter note, I would ask what king of tree was that on the Garden…I don’t think it was an apple tree like we show in all the pictures.

  3. The platypus is the screaming example of God’s sense of humor.

    Pepsi for sure!

    Targeted ads from Google: spa treatments for those who carry the weight of the world(s) on their shoulders.

    Fun questions, BC.

  4. I love that you mentioned the Platypus. It’s part of the reason I’m a blogger. You see, my 17 year old doesn’t believe they exist… and in the goofiness surrounding that whole ordeal, I realized I needed to start writing down some of our stories. Looks like maybe it’s time I share that one…

  5. It’s Coke. But this is not the most controversial mistake, er, thing you said. I AM UP IN ARMS about the sneezing. Sneezing (post childbirth) is possibly the WORST feeling in the world. The. Worst.

    And I’d say Twitter but I only joined Wednesday. It’s still so shiny and new.

  6. I’d make sure to ask whether he knows these other guys, what are they called, Allah, Zeus, Buddha and the like. Are they related to one another? You know, one big, happy family maybe?

  7. Love this post! Pepsi with Lime is my personal favorite! If we didn’t have death, we’d all be so old & tired all the time. If reincarnation exists we get to come back all shiny & new (unless of course we come back as a dung beetle or a platypus).

  8. Is GOD OK with masturbation? What about key parties? Could he drop what he is wasting his time on right now and pay attention to me for awhile? Is there a devil on earth and if so are they hiring? I have a long list…

  9. I love it — #4 “bonus parts” especially!

    I would ask, dear God, whatever happened to Ryan Seacrest’s cohost from A.I. Season 1? So after Ryan obviously croaked him, did he throw him into a lake or did he hide him in his Cro-Magnon Man brow bones?

    Mainly, I want to ask God if the internet will one day be the death of human relationships.

  10. I’d ask, “Can we just do something about Rush Limbaugh now? Let me handle him, please.”

    Sometimes I just feel sorry for God.

  11. Its Pepsi ! and I think Q9 about tasting like chicken is because everybody likes chicken, in some form or another….and if were going for hair, you missed Beyonce, Rihanna, and Katy Perry

  12. Hilarious! I would love to know what God’s Google ads are for, too…and I’d love to know if Donald’s hair was real. It can’t be, but that means he added it on purpose!

A penny for your thoughts! And by penny, I mean a warm-fuzzy in your heart.

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