You know. The kind of day where you sigh and say “Wait, why do I have camel food in my car?” Yeah, me, too.
It’s not as if I feed camels everyday. I don’t. They’re on the other side of the zoo from where I work, and I rarely venture that far in a day’s volunteering. But there it is. In the console, waiting to make some camel very happy. Or very sick. That stuff has been in there for at least a year.
The biggest why comes not from the fact that camel food appeared in my car. That would be like asking why there are rocks in my dryer. Duh. The real question is why it’s still there. My husband cleans out my car all the time. “What a sweetie,” you might say. And he is. But not when it comes to my car. He has very specific ideas about what is allowed to stay in my car and what is not.
Items on the unacceptable list include but are not limited to:
Car books. You know what I’m talking about. Books we keep in the car so we have something to read in the car line at school, etc. They’re too good to throw away, not good enough to devote any real time to.
Napkins. Am I the only parent who stashes fast food napkins in the console for emergencies? Where else am I going to put the boogie that Squish sweetly wipes on my sleeve? I’ve been forced to get creative.
Emergency stash of feminine hygiene products. A napkin is a napkin, no matter how sanitary. I assume these are like kryptonite and must be removed from the little drawer under the passenger’s side seat before it is safe for a guy to drive the car.
The sign with my son’s name on it that allows me to retrieve the kid from school when I am forced to drive.
Any CD by The Wiggles. He may have a point with that one.
Extra pair of shoes for Squish. Seriously. You never know when a sandal is going to
go flying out the window break.
Reusable bags. To be perfectly truthful, these are not removed from the car. They are locked neatly in the trunk, so I think they’ve been left behind.
Sunscreen. He might be trying to kill me.
Items that are apparently deemed worthy to stay include:
Any CD by REM. Except for the ones that mysteriously disappear and later turn up in his car.
The only question remaining is why I have not removed it myself. And that’s an easy one. I rarely see it. The bag is usually buried under clean napkins. Maybe I’m not perfect, either.
What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever found in your car?