Maybe This Will Be My Day

The sun melts all around me, and yet...

The sun melts all around me, and yet…

It happens sometimes. The good things swirl around and around me, teasing with their nearness, but then they dance away again like bashful butterflies, never lighting on me.

The last couple of weeks have been like that. I feel like I am invisible. I see the people around me wallowing in the richness. I try to be happy for them, to experience their joy the way I know they would for me. But it’s hard. I am sick and sad and a little jealous.

I ask myself what’s wrong with me? Am I not as good as everybody else? Why them? Why not me? Am I invisible? I want to scream “HERE I AM!” Is there something wrong with me?

Sometimes I feel angry, too. I have  the same wants and needs as anybody else.

I pick myself up and move on. It is for me to choose how I view the world, and I choose hope. I get out of bed now each and every morning with one thought. Maybe today is for me. Perhaps it is my turn. And I feel that hope. And I hold onto it and I pray.

And one day, when I say it, it will be true. One day will be the day that someone says those words I so long to hear:

Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?”

Because I WOULD like to buy some Thin Mints. I have money and everything. And not a single Girl Scout has asked. It hurts. But maybe today will be my day. I have $4. Let’s talk.

23 thoughts on “Maybe This Will Be My Day

  1. The Girl Scouts in your area need to up their game. I don’t know any Girl Scouts and I’ve still been asked just while out and about. (Sadly, I said no… but only because my husband was home and I wasn’t carrying a bag big enough to smuggle them in with me.)

  2. I didn’t have any girl scouts come to our house… but I did find some girl scouts selling cookies in front of a beer growler store. They even had a sign pairing the cookies with different beers, and were giving out free samples of all the different cookies, and took credit cards. I bought 5 boxes because I thought they were genius.

A penny for your thoughts! And by penny, I mean a warm-fuzzy in your heart.

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