Friends, I have been issued a challenge this weekend by The Hobbler. Ever play the game “Two Truths And A Lie?” We’re taking it to the next level. Which of the following are true, and which are only wishes?
1) The dance troupe I toured with did a performance in Japan. For the wife of the chairman of the board of Toyota motors.
2) I was once bitten by a baby caiman. When I was using it in an education program. Its teeth only broke the skin, but I gained a new respect for crocodilians.
3) I once swallowed a live goldfish on a bet. And I promptly threw it up. The victim, however, did not survive. I still feel really guilty, and it hurts my heart to even think about it.
4) I nearly missed my high school graduation to go to a dog show. My mom bribed me into collecting my diploma at the last second.
5) I am turning a walk-in closet into a reptile room. So I will finally have a place to breed woma pythons. The closet is already outfitted with wire shelving and two electrical outlets. Just waiting for my income tax refund to finish the work and buy the snakes.
6) I once used the “f” word in a paper for high school English. And still got an “A.”
7) I have a potted fern with a history. I started it from a spore that came from one of the flower arrangements at my grandmother’s funeral.
8) My most prized possession is a hard-cover first edition of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. It was an accidental find at a used book store, and I only paid $30 for it! It’s one of only three things in our safe deposit box.
9) Despite my number of posts on passive aggression, like this one, this one, and this one, I am not actually passive aggressive. I am pretty direct. With a devious imagination.
10) When I visited Los Angeles, the only celebrity I saw was Judy Tenuta. And she was drunk. Without her accordion.
11) I once bottle-fed a litter of deer mice. They eat every 45 minutes, so I had to sneak them into work in a cooler.
12) I hatched a clutch of garter snake eggs that were found in a pile of mulch. Seven of the nine eggs hatched, and the babies were released at the site where the eggs were found.
Any guesses? I’m not even telling you how many truths there are. How well do you know me? Even better, how well do I know YOU? I challenge you to do a fib post of your own. If you do, send me the link so I can make my guesses!
Truth or wish? This blog is ghost-written by Kisses the Cat
Update: If you want to find the truth without having to dig around too much, click here. Because I’m a giver.