Tracking Santa

Remember the radio stations that used to track Santa for us? How they would announce that jolly St. Nick had been spotted in Canada or what have you, and all the kids would dive into bed and fake sleep?  The Middlest Sister captures the very essence of a childhood Christmas eve. If you haven’t checked her out, what are you waiting for? Brilliant, beautiful comic strips created from scraps of cloth and paper.

Anyway, I’m doing my own version of a Santa track. I ordered something from overseas as a Christmas gift. I’ll explain exactly why in another post. The site usually announces the last day to order to get your stuff for Christmas, and this year they didn’t. I ordered fully expecting to receive my package around New Year’s. I was prepared to hand over an IOU on Christmas morning.

And then I got an email saying it has been shipped, and it’s supposed to be here by Christmas Eve. Yippee! And I started to hope. Big mistake.

Here’s how I imagine the postal service working. My package is shipped. Someone buys it an airline ticket, usually first class, and sends it on its way. It is met at the gate (yes, the gate. This is my fantasy, remember?) by a chauffeur who drives it to the next gate and buckles it into its seat belt. This is the long leg of the journey, so it is tucked in with a blanket and it settles in for a 14 hour flight. It has a few drinks, socializes with a couple of B-list celebrities, and it arrives, revived and refreshed, in the good old US of A. It is met by yet another chauffeur who ushers it to a limousine and delivers it to my door. Apparently this is not how it actually works. Who knew?

I got the tracking info on the 19th. My package had traveled all the way from Hong Kong to…Taiwan. I’m not totally up on geography, but it seems like with modern conveniences such as, oh, I don’t know… airplanes? it might have gone further in two days’ time. The next stop on its adventure was Japan, where it spent another couple of days.

I got notice today that my stuff is now in the USA. In Anchorage, Alaska. The tracking estimate still shows it arriving at my house on Monday. Because it never snows in Alaska.Will it get here on time? Doubtful. But I do look forward to seeing what other lovely locations my package gets to travel to.

Frankly, I am envious. That box is having a better vacation than I will this year.

My daily joy: I found my husband the best Christmas present ever. He is going to love it, and I can’t wait to see his face! I’m pretending that I got him boring stuff because he is psychic  when it comes to gifts.

I expect his face will look kind of like this.

I expect his face will look kind of like this.



Nearly Wordless Wednesday: A Tiny Misunderstanding

I wondered why my little Santaphobe was suddenly on board with paying a visit. He was suddenly so excited to see Santa. “Go see Santa and sit on his lap!” became his favorite phrase over the weekend. So on Monday, I loaded him into the car and we went. And on the way, it became clear. “You sit Santa’s lap, Squish take ‘pitcher.'” Oh. In the manner of parents desperate for that precious picture with Santa, I discussed, explained, negotiated, and bribed. So here’s what we agreed on:



No. Not this. This:


Yes, indeed. Sometimes the toddler wins.


It would almost be worth sending Christmas cards this year.




Santa photo: