It’s been a while since I made a confession here. People like confessions. That might be why my most popular post ever was this one. So here it is.
I am not a cat person. What is that I hear? It is the sound of thousands of people running screaming to the “unfollow”button. It might be my neighbor actually screaming. She has a problem.. But there you have it. I’m not a cat person. I am a dog person. Dogs come in all shapes and sizes and are bred with an actual purpose in life. Golden Retrievers hunt, Rottweilers drove cattle to market, Schnauzers were ratters. Cats all look relatively the same, and they have the work ethic of a salted slug. Cats are fine, but I am not a cat person. Because reasons.
Cats are self-absorbed.
They never let you forget that they are number one in their book.
She sleeps hugging herself. No one loves Pixel like Pixel.
Cats are entitled.
They take what they want, even if it’s yours. Food, furniture, the good spot on the bed. It’s all theirs.
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- Seriously? THIS IS MY TABLE!
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- Bellatrix, that’s my CLEAN LAUNDRY!
Cats are lazy.
They will rub your nose in it every chance they get that you have to earn a living, and they do not.
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- Wow. You’re really working hard here, Pixel.
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- “No, Kisses will NOT read this book and write your report! You can’t MAKE ME!”
Cats are destructive.
They will tear your heart into tiny pieces when it’s time for them to leave you.
It’s been over two years, and not a day goes by that I don’t miss you, Piper. I love you, old lady.
Becoming Cliche 
Self-absorbed? Check.
Entitled? Check.
Lazy and destructive? Check and mate!
You have put your finger on precisely why I adore cats. Or it’s also possible you were just describing me and wanted to be polite about it? Either way, spot on!!
[I’m going to imagine Piper and my own beloved old ladycat gambolling together in the hereafter. Well… except I don’t remember if Hildi ever gamboled. I’m sure she’ll hiss at Piper plenty, though!]
I am not a car person AT ALL. For all the reasons mentioned, and I’m highly allergic. It’s misery for me to even step foot into the hone of a cat. I swell up.like an oompa-loompa.
I am highly allergic, too. It’s a good thing I only have five of them.
No way! Lol. I think my head would literally explode. My sister has 2. I can’t even visit her house. My eyes swell shut. Serious talk.
I take a LOT of allergy/asthma meds.
I can imagine. Lol
With cat owners, the cat is self-absorbed, entitled, lazy, and destructive.
With dog owners, the owner is self-absorbed, entitled, lazy, and destructive.
I have both, so I clearly fall into both categories!
In life, balance is key.
Your reasons are all the same reasons I love them, myself. I love the cat’s attitude of “I’m not going to jump, just because you want me to” vs. a dog’s “How high? How high should I jump? How often? When? When? When? Slobber, slobber, slobber.” (I do like dogs as well, but find the cat’s personal hygiene much preferred).
Sorry you’re missing Pixel. We miss our old Chloe girl, who – in November – will have been gone 7 years already. We just had a “Chloe moment” last weekend, me and my husband — she was HIS girl and adored him fiercely.
They leave such large holes in our hearts when they go.
“the work ethic of a salted slug”
You make that sound like a bad thing?!!
I think they’re just smarter than us to be able to get away with it.
We all know that dogs have owners but cats have staff. I’ve had horses, goats,chickens, ducks, dogs, and cats and been a slave to them all.
Me, too. No chickens or ducks, but I am not ashamed to say that I serve a 150 year old tortoise. And the five cats.
It’s true. Polly spends at least half the day sleeping in the linen cupboard. I even put an old pillow in there to save my towels from cat fur. When she decides to emerge it’s to announce that she’s hungry and when is dinner? She claws my armchairs. But I feel privileged when she gets on my lap.
That last part. Yes. That last part.
Hmm…I think you’re much less likely to be ostracized for this confession than if you had to admit you’re not a dog person! It’s also easier to hide not liking cats because they are rarely out in public and “Cat Friendly Offices” are not a thing!
I’m determined to make our newest kitten a therapy cat. Maybe there will be cat friendly offices one day. If I were a cat person…
Oh no you are missing your old cat.. (not a cat person at all I think not) c
Yeah. Not a cat person. Not even a little bit. *cuddles newest kittens* Not a cat person.
Not a cat person my arse! I write this with my sweet Molly on my lap who thinks my water glass is her water glass and my yogurt and blueberry smoothie is hers. Our burden is great with these little lives relying on us. I consider errant cat hair to be an excellent source of fiber. Ha
I always wonder if I should write “cat hair” as an allergen when I take a dish to a potluck, or if it is just understood.
I wasn’t a cat person for a LONG time!! Our first cat Oliver was very distanced… he had a love/hate relationship with my sister. Lol
It wasn’t until a few years ago when she found a stray and was trying to get her to come around her… and then she started having kittens and I love baby animals so I basically changed my tone. I’m still very surprised I love cats as much as I do!
And I don’t hate you for not liking them, a lot of people don’t like them. They’re not like dogs where they’re easy to please! So you’re good! 🙂
I have five cats and only one dog. At some point I am going to have to make my peace with the fact that I AM a crazy cat lady.
Oh my!! Lol
I still miss everyone of our pets. It’s been 16 years since our last cat Zane Grey and I still miss her purrs, kneading and head butts. My heart breaks to write this… Our most recent loss was last month – our sheltie LucyLu (15) was my constant companion. Up to the end she still did a beautiful “Mighty Dog” run back to the house.
Oh, Linda! I am so sorry for your loss!
Aw, I loved this!
I’m like you, I will always have a dog, on that I have no doubt. But there’s something about those self-absorbed, entitled, lazy felines that causes me to take one in occasionally. Maybe because they remind me of myself? 😉
They are just so weird that I am finding myself more and more drawn to them.
All true, but I would dispute that cats are not workers. Nestle’s job is to take care of any flies and bugs that might venture into the house. I suppose if we had mice, it would be her job to take care of them too. Thanks goodness we don’t have mice, but she does a great job on the bugs.
In fact yesterday a fly got in the door. I said to hubby “hey a fly came in with you and the dogs”. His response was to tell Nestle, that is her job. I don’t see the fly this morning so I guess she got it….lol.
You speak truth. The cats are like Santa, I guess. They don’t work most days, but on that one day a year, they rise to the occasion.
Your reasoning holds as much water as the Brexiter’s promises! Last sentence says it all 😀
HAHA! Shhhh! I’m not ready to admit it yet.
I’m a new follower of your blog. You made me guffaw with the 17 Stages of Alexander Hamilton, and now I’m weeping with the last bit. It’s a crazy day.
Thank you for posting such personal glimpses into real life. It’s important for people such as I am to still feel connected to the outside world. ❤️❤️❤️❤️